This week getting back into work here at the base of YWAM Los Angeles has been rough. Not in the sense that horrible things have happened, but because I've felt slightly, well, extremely disconnected from Jesus. It's been so draining to get out of bed in the morning to serve, and choosing to have joy has been difficult.
I absolutely love what I do! I love being a missionary, serving and reaching out to people in the sex industry and human trafficking. I know its what God has called me to and he has given me so much passion for these people. When weeks like this week come around and I find myself being ungrateful and searching for satisfaction in things other than Jesus' presence, I easily get frustrated with life and everything each day brings.
What happened to getting up each day excited and ready to love people and be like Jesus? All those days of inspiration and excitement, where are those feelings now?
Following Jesus is not a feeling. Its a choice.
So even when we lack desire to face the day, when we don't feel like God is with us, when we don't feel like what we are doing is making a difference. We have a choice. Jesus paid a price to give us a choice.
I was listening to a sermon as I got ready for the day today. It was a message about marriage, by Nate Edwardson from the Stirring Church in Redding, California.
He was teaching from Song of Solomon, and he was teaching us how the man in the beginning is describing the woman he loves in detail, but as the beautifully written poem continues the guy gets more and more intimate and describes even deeper parts of the woman he loves as they grew deeper in intimacy. He made a choice not to stop with surface things, the things he noticed about this woman at first, but he decided to know her deeper and love her deeper. He expressed his love to her and in response she expresses her love for him.
I'm not sure I'm tying these things together very well, though for me it gave me a new perspective and motivation to make the choice.
Am I going to stick with the surface things that I know about Jesus already, or am I going to allow his love, which he expresses to me daily, to draw me deeper in intimacy with Him?
There is so much to Jesus that I have no clue about! Do I want to know him deeper? Do I want to let him sweep me away to the secret place where its just me and him, and I can sit and dwell in his goodness, ponder his faithfulness, dream big dreams, and find peace and rest in the midst of life? HECK YES I DO!
So we got to keep making the choice! Every day! Seek Jesus, meet him in the secret place. Create a place where intimacy between you and Jesus can take place, and it is going to blow your mind! We cant comprehend what Jesus will do if we Just give him the time of day to have his way. If we just let go of control, routine, and comfort to wait on the Lord and see what His plans are.
Don't allow the dry seasons slowly grow you apart from Jesus. Keep pursuing him as he is pursuing you, He never stops! Even when we do for a moment, or for a day,a week, a year he keeps on trying to sweep us away. Though its up to us respond to his Love. Love is sometimes a feeling but it can be sacrifice too, its trust, its having faith when we don't see or feel anything Jesus is up to.
Tonight I was reminded of that decision, and man do I have a longing to be with Jesus. I have a deep desire to be in the presence of Jesus.
He's all I need.
He's enough.
That's it,
Nothing else,
Just,
Jesus.
~Emily
I absolutely love what I do! I love being a missionary, serving and reaching out to people in the sex industry and human trafficking. I know its what God has called me to and he has given me so much passion for these people. When weeks like this week come around and I find myself being ungrateful and searching for satisfaction in things other than Jesus' presence, I easily get frustrated with life and everything each day brings.
What happened to getting up each day excited and ready to love people and be like Jesus? All those days of inspiration and excitement, where are those feelings now?
Following Jesus is not a feeling. Its a choice.
So even when we lack desire to face the day, when we don't feel like God is with us, when we don't feel like what we are doing is making a difference. We have a choice. Jesus paid a price to give us a choice.
I was listening to a sermon as I got ready for the day today. It was a message about marriage, by Nate Edwardson from the Stirring Church in Redding, California.
He was teaching from Song of Solomon, and he was teaching us how the man in the beginning is describing the woman he loves in detail, but as the beautifully written poem continues the guy gets more and more intimate and describes even deeper parts of the woman he loves as they grew deeper in intimacy. He made a choice not to stop with surface things, the things he noticed about this woman at first, but he decided to know her deeper and love her deeper. He expressed his love to her and in response she expresses her love for him.
I'm not sure I'm tying these things together very well, though for me it gave me a new perspective and motivation to make the choice.
Am I going to stick with the surface things that I know about Jesus already, or am I going to allow his love, which he expresses to me daily, to draw me deeper in intimacy with Him?
There is so much to Jesus that I have no clue about! Do I want to know him deeper? Do I want to let him sweep me away to the secret place where its just me and him, and I can sit and dwell in his goodness, ponder his faithfulness, dream big dreams, and find peace and rest in the midst of life? HECK YES I DO!
So we got to keep making the choice! Every day! Seek Jesus, meet him in the secret place. Create a place where intimacy between you and Jesus can take place, and it is going to blow your mind! We cant comprehend what Jesus will do if we Just give him the time of day to have his way. If we just let go of control, routine, and comfort to wait on the Lord and see what His plans are.
Don't allow the dry seasons slowly grow you apart from Jesus. Keep pursuing him as he is pursuing you, He never stops! Even when we do for a moment, or for a day,a week, a year he keeps on trying to sweep us away. Though its up to us respond to his Love. Love is sometimes a feeling but it can be sacrifice too, its trust, its having faith when we don't see or feel anything Jesus is up to.
Tonight I was reminded of that decision, and man do I have a longing to be with Jesus. I have a deep desire to be in the presence of Jesus.
He's all I need.
He's enough.
That's it,
Nothing else,
Just,
Jesus.
~Emily